Kill the Beetle!

[tb1024]

It tastes like plastic, so the spits it.

Then I throw the beetle on a VERY strong base.

[Yoshi021]

But I put the beetle into an armor that is resistant to bases.

But it is weak to strong acids. I trow the beetle into the strongest and deadliest acid of all.

[tb1024]

But before that I changed the base shield for an acid shield that can resist to it.

But then I put the beetle on the strong base again.

[Wohlstand]

I mixed strong base with deadliest acid and resulted environment is neutral.

I put to bonfire a frying pan, filled with vegetable oil, then after few minutes I jailed beetle under cover on frying pan and waited 1 hour.

[Yoshi021]

While you waited 1 hour, I saved the beetle.

I take the beetle into Area 51 where it is kept in maximum security in the most hidden place in the world.

[tb1024]

Carl Johnson knows where it is. He breaks it at night and saves the beetle and brings it to me.

Then I squish it with 101% accuracy with a sledge hammer.

[lighthouse64]

You can't squish anything with a hologram of a sledge hammer...

I infect the beetle with an incurable virus that kills it instantly.

[Yoshi021]

I inject it with a vaccine that takes the virus out of the body, without killing the virus (incurable virus), and quarantine the virus. Then I give the beetle medical attention.

I make a .lua which I use to kill the beetle with.

[Wohlstand]

But that .lua ranned on the modified by me interpreter which has some replaced function to copy beetle until it will be killed.

I moved it into RAM by small assembly code sequence, then filled HDD with zeros, then unplugged electricity of house and this computer to clear entire RAM where beetle stored

[tb1024]

But it wasn't in virtual reality in first place.

I tell the beetle cringe jokes in beetle language until it dies.

[Wohlstand]

But you spoke in language of another beetle type, language of this beetle type is chemical, I.e. you should provide specific liquid with specified smells combination to tell something.

I left beetle in a huge flat hermetic space with no horse crap to eat (it's earth-boring dung beetle).

[tb1024]

But it is filled with cow poop, so it works in the same way.

I fill the bag with cringe joke earth-boring beetle pheromones, enough for it to die.

[lighthouse64]

The beetle munches its way out of the bag and wanders off.

However, it wanders right into my trap where it vomits and dies in acid.

[tb1024]

Acid was low concentration acetic acid, as vinegar, so it is alive.

I drop it on sulfuric-nitric-chloric-flouric acid mixture.

[lighthouse64]

The beetle has the ability wonder guard and because the beetle has no major weaknesses, it has no effect.

I kill the beetle with stress.

[Alvespires]

But the beetle is very calm.

I make the beetle hear Lavander town theme and comit suicide

[tb1024]

This beetle is tails, it can die and resurrect indefinitely.

But its soul is now tormented.

[Alvespires]

Yeah but then comes Simon Beltmont and throw holywater on him.

The Beetle discovered the cake is a lie then comited suicide again

[Yoshi021]

I gave the beetle a psychologist.

I go back in time before the beetle was born, and kill it's parents.

[tb1024]

You create a grandfather paradox, because if the beetle wasn't born, you wouldn't go kill it in the past, and it is born, and you go kill it in the past....
So the Universe Council decides that your time travel must be nullified.

The beetle finds out about YouTube advertiser friendly content guidelines and commits suicide again.